justification and victory over porn

Disclaimer: Friend, I want to be as gentle as possible. But I want to be honest as well. If you’re looking for shortcuts to gain victory over pornography, probably this article is not for you. Here, I am going to talk about how pornography affects the deepest areas of your soul. Deep-seated problems require powerful tools to solve them - it demands a determined mindset that is not afraid of genuine self-examination but still hopeful in God's strength. I hope this article will provide some tools for understanding as you fight this battle.

I have great difficulty remembering things. I must put extra effort into remembering Bible verses. You would not believe what I am going to tell you. I used to ride a moped to get around in my town. I would kickstart the moped and know where I am going but suddenly, right in the middle of traffic, I would forget where I was going. It is just nerve-racking. Once a friend asked about the title of the book I wrote (I wrote a book no one reads!) And I could not recall the title. Can you believe that? This would make you nervous. I was preaching and forgot what I was talking about. My heart raced and I almost panicked. It happened a few times. The list of my memory problems is endless. As much as these problems make my life difficult, it’s okay. But one thing I do not want to forget but still do is who I am in Jesus Christ - My identity in Christ. It causes me significant spiritual problems. It is something I need to work on. Paul Tripp refers to this as ‘Functional Gospel Amnesia’.[1] In this article, I want to show how our identity amnesia precipitates more pornography and on the other hand, how the doctrine of justification helps overcome porn.

identity-amnesia

What would you say, If someone were to ask you ‘Who are you’? When people introduce themselves, they say - hello, I am so and so. But you know that you are not your name. You are more than your name. If someone says “I am a realtor”. He knows that he is more than a realtor. He might be a father or a husband. It isn't as easy as you think to articulate who we are. That could be one of the reasons why it almost takes a lifetime for married couples to figure out who their spouse is. In his book, ‘Pride’, Matthew Robinson makes a strong case for why our identity is not self-generated but God-given. He says, “Our existence is something we became aware of, not something we caused.”[2] He talks more about how our identity is inextricably linked to what we worship - our desires. But our interest here is answering the question - how do I know who I am?

We cannot determine our true identity by looking inward. The internal turmoil within us makes it all the more difficult to interpret who we are. Adding to the complexity, our desires and feelings further convolute our understanding of our identity. The internal sinfulness in our hearts and external brokenness in the world, make it even more challenging to decipher who we are. Our identity- amnesia comes from the confusion within. This internal confusion leads to the craziest things that defy logic. One may argue, “Because I do not care who I am, I don’t care what I do.” Doesn’t this kind of identity amnesia or taking on a self-generated identity sometimes manifest itself in horrendous behavior?

porn's Undermining effect on our identity

Let us now imagine a person who is a believer but addicted to pornography. If you were to ask him who he is, what would he say? What would be at his forefront? How would he respond if someone said that he is a child of God? Because of the effects of porn, feelings of shame and guilt make it seem impossible to believe that he is a child of God and God loves him. “If I am a child of God, why am I acting this way? Probably, either I am not a child of God or God does not care about me” are recurring themes that play in his mind. His miserable feelings about himself would have a blinding effect on him. His understanding that he is a child of God gets eroded by the waves of both guilt and shame. In other words, his miserable feelings are the only lens through which he views God and himself.

To further complicate the issue, due to the regular intake of porn, he gets used to patterns of obtaining the highest levels of satisfaction with the release of dopamine along with other neurotransmitters. Dopamine is the neurotransmitter that is linked with pleasure, motivation, and reward. Because of the brain's neuroplasticity, new pathways are established to derive pleasure. Inevitably what may happen is that every other experience is subconsciously compared and contrasted with ejaculation. One of the adverse effects of porn is the numbness of the soul.  No wonder it is difficult to feel that you’re a child of God when you’re used to deriving pleasure from ejaculation constantly. It is hard to feel that you’re a child of God when you are in a rut. Even though you might know that you are a child of God your struggle creates a dissonance between what you know and how you think.  

Our Identity in Christ

 

When you're in the thick of the struggle, not knowing where to go and what to do, you need to come to grips with who you are in Jesus Christ. When you believe in Jesus Christ, you are united with Jesus Christ. Out of this union comes justification and sanctification. There are multiple things I can talk about but right now, I want to zero in on how God justifies sinners. I know justification cannot be isolated from sanctification. In this article, I will focus on how justification meets our identity crisis head-on. In my next article, we will discuss what repentance looks like in light of progressive sanctification. 

God's Love Does Not Wax and Wane

Before you begin to understand any foundational doctrines of the Bible, I want you to explore them from two lenses. 1. Viewing it From God’s Perspective 2. How God’s Truth Intersects with Our Lives. Although we can discuss these subjects at length, let us keep them brief here.

Looking at God’s point of view, God’s love does not wax and wane. God’s commitment to his people is unwaverable (Jer. 31:3). God has got our unfaithfulness covered through the impeccable life, death, and resurrection of His Son - Jesus Christ. God's eternal love for his Son is the same love he gives to those who believe in him (Rom 5:8).[3] Because of God’s eternal love and goodness, he justifies a sinner through faith in the perfect sacrifice of Jesus Christ.

When a sinner believes in Jesus, Jesus’s righteousness is credited to him. When someone puts their faith in Jesus, a great exchange takes place. Christ’s righteousness is credited to the one who believes and the believer’s sin is placed upon Jesus Christ. All this happens because the believer sees Jesus Christ as his substitute. Though he failed to live a righteous, just, holy, and compassionate life according to God’s standards, because of his faith in Jesus, he is treated as if he has lived that perfect life. Though his sins demand punishment according to God’s just standards, because he trusts in Jesus Christ, God declares him to be righteous.[4]

If you trust in Jesus Christ, God sees you as righteous as Jesus Christ is. This is your status before God, not your nature ( although your nature changes because of regeneration; but that is another topic for another time) - meaning, Christ’s righteousness is not injected internally but you’re treated unblemished because of your faith in Christ’s life, death, and resurrection. If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, your status before God does not change. His love covenantal love does not wax and wane.  This is your identity. This is who you are. You are dearly loved by our Heavenly Father. If God’s great act of justification does not motivate you to fight porn (sanctification), there may be something seriously wrong with your understanding of the gospel. 

How Does Justification Affect our Lives?

After watching pornography, you suddenly feel that you’re deep in muck. You feel guilty and ashamed. It is when you feel like you're deep in the dumps, you must remember that you are not more justified when you perform a good act than you already are. You are not less justified when you sin than you already are. It does not mean that God is okay with your sin. Though we cannot attribute human feelings to God, you must understand every time you watch porn, God is deeply hurt. So, justification is not the grounds for watching more porn. It is a gift. This great love of God, shown through Jesus Christ, should give you the courage and confidence to defeat the sin of pornography.

How Does Justification Impact our Feelings?

You’re irritated. You’re angry. You’re angry at yourself, you’re short with others, and maybe, you’re angry with God. You know that you feel horrible and rotten inside. You cannot find one single reason why you should go to Jesus Christ and ask forgiveness. It is exactly when you feel like you’re a hypocrite asking for forgiveness again and again, you must remind yourself of your identity in Jesus - I am not less justified because of the perfect life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. I will be forgiven because of the atonement of Jesus Christ. God will not drive me away because of Jesus Christ.

Though our feelings ebb and flow, God’s truth does not change. Our feelings should be anchored in something unchangeable. Our feelings must be transformed by truth. This is what I want you to remember. Do not ever suppress your feelings but do not be driven by them either. I want you to take your feelings as they are into God’s presence and examine them in light of the Word of God. The Psalmist is our role model in this area because it takes feeling to the Lord as they are.

This is what prayer looks like when you take your feelings to the Lord as they are. “Lord, I feel miserable. I feel horrible inside, outside, and everywhere. I cannot show my face to you for what I have done. Honestly, I do not feel like praying. I feel like running away never to be seen by anyone. But Lord, I know that you will not drive anyone when they come to you. You accept me not because of what I have done, but because of Your Son Jesus Christ. I know my sin has hurt you. I have let you down big time. I know my sin is horrible, but I ask you to forgive my sin of pornography. The only basis why I ask forgiveness is the perfect sacrifice of Your Son Jesus Christ. I rest in the everlasting arms of Jesus Christ. Please hear my cry. Regardless of how I feel, I trust you and your word. May the light and warmth of Jesus’s righteous life, sacrificial death, and resurrection from the dead, melt my heart. May I bask in the sunshine of the unchangeable truth - Justification by faith alone. May it transform me deeply for Your glory. Please help me to overcome this sin so that I may rejoice in you more and more.  In Jesus Name, Amen.”

The truth of the matter is when we think that God has forgotten about us, we must remember God does not suffer from ‘amnesia’ as we do. We need to remind ourselves of his covenant loyalty and undiminished grace regardless of what we have done. Does this motivate you to love God or watch porn?

Some Practical Advice

1. Remember, God’s justification is never a license to sin. Rather, it should act as a springboard to fight sin like never before.

2. There is no excuse not to be accountable to your pastor or Christian brother or sister, no matter what stage you are in your battle against porn.

3. If you’re committed to being accountable to someone in the church, don’t let them ask you ‘how are you doing?’. Please be proactive in confessing your sins with your accountability partner. Genuine repentance begins from you, and it does not stop there.

4. Remember, what you do when no one sees you is what you really are. If you do not watch porn before your wife or a Christian brother or sister, why do you think can do it when no one is around? Do you want to treat God less than your wife a Christian brother or a sister?

5. Though seeking help from outside the church for pornography is not restricted, it ought to be viewed only from the gospel lens. Anything contrary to the Bible must be outrightly rejected. Remember, transformation can only happen by the power of the Holy Spirit and by the grace of Jesus Christ.

[1] Paul David Tripp, Lead (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2020), 58.

[2] Matthew P. W. Roberts, Pride: Identity and the Worship of Self (Great Britain: Christian Focus Publications Ltd, 2023), 17.

[3] Herman Bavinck, Reformed Dogmatics (vol. Abridged in One Volume; Grand Rapids, Mich: Baker Academic, 2011), 205.

[4] Read the book of Romans, chapters 3,4, and 5, and see where Paul grounds his argument. God shows his wrath towards both the Gentiles who were without the law (Rom. 1: 18-32) and the Jews who possessed the law ( Rom. 2:5-28). While both the Jews and the Gentiles ( the entire humanity) were under condemnation, God being the just ( a person who cannot let go of sin unpunished) and the justifier ( a person who justifies the ungodly) declares a sinner to be righteous because of his faith in the atonement of Jesus Christ ( Rom. 3:21-26).